Redirection

Had my redirection day today. Or rather, redirection night.
It's been an eventful year, the year with the most ups and downs yet.
I decided and told God only 24 hours ago that I'd spend the entire day cleaning up my room, sorting out stuff, reviewing, and refocusing.

And I did not carry out my decision. I procrastinated and procrastinated and procrastinated and procrastinated....Until God decided to stop waiting for me to stop procrastinating, to step in and start redirecting my life for me.

Basically, this was what happened:
I procrastinated. Hunched in front of the PC all day, I couldn't care less about lifting a neuron. Yes, unhealthy. I admit, I am hooked to PC games. Idolatry, sigh. So I didn't properly fulfill the errands given to me by mom in the morning.. So I was told off (plus all the emotional turmoil, I'll spare the details) .. What happened next is pretty embarassing for me.
Anyway there are tears and snot all over my T-shirt now, so you can guess. I wanted to argue but I didn't have any voice left(sheesh).


So my life was in a mess, and now God has graciously brought it back on track.
I thank him for His forgiveness, so much. When I was getting scolded, I couldn't say I was sorry. I couldn't figure out why I couldn't utter 'sorry'... maybe I was afraid of what my mom would say after that, maybe I was afraid I wouldn't mean my sorry.. And then I came before Him, with my mess, confessing my messy life ever since I took control of it, and suddenly I realise the reason behind my inability to apologise.

It was because I hadn't said sorry to God before then. And I realise that I wasn't hurting my mom as much as I was hurting God, considering how many of my daily devotions I missed. I guess I was pretty much a spiritually backslidden Christian.


Thank You LORD, for Your faithfulness.
- when I was unfaithful -
Thank You LORD, for Your grace and mercy.
- when I was selfish -
Thank You LORD, for redirecting my life.
- when I mess up everytime -



I sang the following stanzas during the whole ordeal:

Amazing Grace how sweet the sound
that saved a wretch like me
I was once lost but now am found
Was blind but now I see

Create in me a clean heart, O God,
And renew a right spirit within me.
Cast me not away from the presence O Lord
And take not thy Holy Spirit from me
Restore unto me the joy of life's salvation
And renew a right spirit within me

We fall down we lay our crowns
at the feet of Jesus
The greatness of His mercy and love
at the feet of Jesus
We cry holy, holy, holy
is the Lamb

1 John 1:9 - Jika kita mengaku dosa kita, maka Ia adalah setia dan adil, sehingga Ia akan mengampuni segala dosa kita dan menyucikan dari segala kejahatan.


His promises are absolute.
His promises are kept.
His promises are always on time.

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