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Thursday, August 28, 2008

There goes

There goes my math paper. Flunked it.

Out of 60 marks, I've only managed 45 at MAX. If every math question I've completed within that 45 marks is correct, then I can breathe a sigh of relief. Sadly, doubt settles in and says that might not be the case. Ah well, every failure has a better life lesson behind it.

Never flunked my math paper before. Maybe this is what academic failure tastes like. Not to my fond taste at all. =)

Failure! Look behind and you see a lure to just be bitter about it. Wake up, and learn from failure! =)

Tuesday, August 26, 2008

My Mid Semester Exams

  1. Just one day to go, I have not even read half my syllabus for one third of my subjects yet. That means I'm only 1/6 prepared!!!! 28 HOURS TO GO!
  2. And then I wonder if it's just my lazy nature that makes me procrastinate with my work. How does one differentiate between 'taking a break' and 'lazing around'? OK, maybe for some people out there, it is quite a clear cut difference. But I can't seem to find that fine line. Where is it?
  3. Or maybe I AM just too busy, too many things for my little hands to handle. And then I struggle with the thought that maybe I'm not believing that I can handle all these responsibilities simultaneously. One can commit to everything, but not be focused in all of it. Should I take a break? Step down from responsibilities?
  4. Or maybe my mind is just in a mess because of all that's happened in the past few months. Too messy a mess in my mind eats up a lot of my time when I think about things, or does it not? I'm so worried in making the right decisions to get myself out of the mess that sometimes throws me deeper into it.
  5. Or maybe it's my spiritual walk. Missing my appointments with God? Too sleepy to get up in the morning to fulfil my devotions? Or I'm being overly noisy that I can't hear my God speak.
OF COURSE, these are just possibilities my mind has thought of in the past 10 minutes. Care to pick which you think fits you most, in YOUR troubled times?
Regardless, the answer and solution to your troubled times remains simple, just that we fail to remember it sometimes. The answer: Absolute trust in God.

Trust in the LORD your God with all your heart, and lean not on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will make your paths straight. Prov 3:5-6

Saturday, August 23, 2008


Are you frustrated? I am. I am
clouded by it. I'm lost. I don't know which direction to run first. So where do I begin? I begin in the word of God. And in Your Word, I find You, Jesus.

Peace that transcends all understanding, found only in You, Jesus. When you're in the right place in my heart, the mist and clouds of frustration might remain, yet a light strong enough pierces through, and shows me a way out. A beam of hope out of this cloud of frustration..

Leaving all of it behind, all it's messiness. I'm moving on. Bye, past.

Wait upon the Holy Spirit. He's searching for you, give Him time to find you.

The LORD is my light and my salvation—
whom shall I fear?
The LORD is the stronghold of my life—
of whom shall I be afraid?

Wait for the LORD;
be strong and take heart
and wait for the LORD

Psalm 27: 1, 14

Wednesday, August 20, 2008

I stand amazed

I stand amazed in the presence
Of Jesus the Nazarene,
And wonder how He could love me,
A sinner, condemned, unclean.

O how marvelous! O how wonderful!
And my song shall ever be:
O how marvelous! O how wonderful!
Is my Savior's love for me!

He took my sins and my sorrows,
He made them His very own;
He bore the burden to Calvary,
And suffered and died alone.

When with the ransomed in glory
His face I at last shall see,
’Twill be my joy through the ages
To sing of His love for me.

Tuesday, August 19, 2008

Satay Kajang

When you've read the post title, it's natural to assume "Oh, it's going to be a story about the blogger's experience with Satay Kajang" .. Well be disappointed! Hah.

Yes I did have Satay Kajang. Yet it was not the highlight of the whole trip.
Met up with Josh Chin, Terrence, Yvonne, and say, "T", for confidentiality.
T is a Mormon, and he also admits he's gay. Yvonne starts this conversation with T, and it was indeed a learning experience. I've never been in personal contact with a Mormon before.

He shares his faith, and his viewpoint about life, Mormonism, and Christianity.

Couple of things I found out about Mormons
  • They believe there is one God for this world, and with the existence of other worlds, there are other gods too.
  • They believe God started somewhere. And that being a human being. He goes through a process that enables him to reach a higher order. Likewise, each man, is able to draw closer to God by reaching a higher order, and becoming like God himself.
  • They believe that hell is separation from god and heaven is closeness to god. Which is of course our belief as well.
  • They believe in God's omnipotence and omniscience. Omnipresence however, applies more to the holy Spirit.
  • They believe the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit are different beings, not the same God.
  • They believe in a 'spirit prison', and a 'paradise', which are intermediates between heaven and hell. People who die before Judgement day and are believers go to 'paradise', whereas those who had not had the chance to hear about Christianity go to 'spirit prison'. And the saints from 'paradise' go down to 'spirit prison' to share about Christianity.
  • They know A LOT about what they believe. Do we?
Either way, he is at the point of searching for an absolute truth. As a matter of fact, everyone is. Most find in the wrong places. Christians sometimes find it in the wrong places too. People are asking questions about life; a deeper meaning, a deeper purpose.

What are we doing about it, as Christians?
The world is waiting.
The world is searching.
The world needs God's love.
The world needs Jesus Christ.
Who will tell them?

Saturday, August 16, 2008

Friendship Evangelism

Who crosses your path every day?
- Most of the time, who do you spend your time with?
Church friends?
CF friends?
Outgoing, more 'up-to-standards' people?

- Who do you spend less time with?
Quieter classmates?
Friends from different cultural backgrounds?

- Who do you HARDLY NOTICE?
Security guards?
Quiet classmates?

65% of our population is at stake. The least reached people in Malaysia. Yes you know who they are. They are around you. Everywhere. They are wondering what to do next. They are wondering why they are made to believe something since they were born. They are looking for an absolute truth in an a world full of lies. Who will share it with them? Will Jesus do it? What would Jesus do?

Wake up, friends. Stop gloating over your own petty problems. Wake up and look at the larger picture. An infinitely larger problem is ahead. Your fellow countrymen has their eternity are at stake.

Thursday, August 14, 2008

Free Fruits!

Yesterday was just gruesome. With fruits!! We had pesta buah-buahan in our college( KOLEJ Ibu Zain) last night. My first impression when I saw the publicity notice on the toilet door was, "Ah, they're going to sell fruits at a cheaper price that's all. I'm not to free to go buy them. Besides, I've got assignments, tutorials and lab reports to finish up on." Incidentally, I was writing my lab report in the college lobby when a faculty-mate invited me to the pesta buah-buahan which was less than 100m away..

Ok, maybe that wasn't so encouraging. So???? It definitely took my mind off my studies and working! I had so much durian(bear in mind they WERE SWEET) I felt so warm even after I took a cold bath. So many free fruits!!! Must have been rm100 of durians in my tummy that night.
Racist remark: Now I know why the malays are so happy all the time. Fully sponsored fruits from the loving government..
Haha, I'm staying in Ibu Zain Residential College next year. You should too! Free fruits!

Tuesday, August 12, 2008

Complaining about his providence?

You know, when we thank God for his provision, it's so often, if not always that we thank Him for physical providence, such as finances, a car, a meal, after we recieve it. That's nothing wrong in that at all.

However, what about when God provides something that we aren't quite satisfied about?

Something we do not want? Not our expectation?

Something we don't deem to be a form of provision from God?

Take for example, God places us in a particular situation, such as a deep trough in life, or maybe we're in a dissatisfactory university or college. No friends, bad lecturers, even traffic problems each time you drive to a lecture. Is that provision from God?

Will we still surrender our situation to God, and thank Him for his provision? To have a spirit of thanksgiving in every situation? Or are we of the assumption that it's not His provision just because our needs weren't fulfilled at that particular moment?

One good example was the Israelite spies who were about to take the land of Canaan. They agreed that the land was good. In accordance with God's promise to bring them to a land flowing with milk and honey. BUT, they listening to false reports and discouragement instead of believing that God will grant them the land.

When you don't believe God will bring you through, you're actually doubting His integrity.

Stop complaining! Take courage!

If you've gotten out of a bad situation recently, He's provided for you!

If you're still in a deep trough or pit, He's providing you with a life lesson, teaching and guiding you in every step, EVEN IF YOU CAN'T TRACE HIS HAND! =)

Thank You LORD, You never cease to provide the best for us, whether or not we consider it to be the best =)

Monday, August 11, 2008

Stop worrying. Start trusting.

Wait? How long more? I just gotta wait. I'm worried.
I gotta wait for God to His work in His timing. Always been taking matters into my own hands, thinking I've got it all under control. Then You step in and show how foolish my seemingly assuring plans are. You never cease to amaze me , God.
Gotta keep pushing hard.. gotta keep pressing into You.
Gotta focus on what's ahead of me now.. not what has been left behind.
Gotta stop worrying. Gotta start trusting. Gotta remain in You. Gotta give you all praise.

Gotta get this passion for Jesus to replace my desire to worry about my own problems. I will not turn back and worry about my past. I will look forward to see how I can glorify His name.

What happened to your passion for Jesus?
Then I said, I will not make mention of him, nor speak any more in his name. But his word was in my heart as a burning fire shut up in my bones, and I was weary with forbearing, and I could not stay.
Jeremiah 20:9

What happened to living by faith?

Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him, and he will make your paths straight.
Prov 3:5-6

Difficulties last only a while, but God's care for you is eternal!
Stop worrying about your own problem, about how you're going to get over it. Start looking around and see how insignificant your problem is as compared to the millions of lives that won't enter heaven just because you were so caught up with your own issues!

Saturday, August 09, 2008

An encouraging blog

Haha, sorry everyone, my posts have all been emo emo posts. Besides, this blog was originally and still is an 'emo' blog anyway.

I shan't say I'll make my posts less emotional, neither will I expect anyone to sympathize =)

But you CAN EMPATHIZE, haha. If you don't know what the difference is, go look it up!

Nothing really the interesting in my blog really, no pictures, a blog that is still at its preliminary stages. But let this be a blog where anyone can encourage each other in the love of Jesus Christ, whether by posting in my cbox, or leaving comments..

So here it is, the encouragement blog!

PS. Anyone who reads this blog I have specially invited, so don't worry, it's not a public blog hehe

Thursday, August 07, 2008


Spaces to be filled. Heart spaces that long for things that do not satisfy. The inadequacy of things that just don't satisfy, such as friendships, studies, relationships, career aspirations.

How will I fill this heart space?

You hold the answer. It's You, Jesus.

Wednesday, August 06, 2008

Pain for His purposes

Paul's Chains Advance the Gospel
12Now I want you to know, brothers, that what has happened to me has really served to advance the gospel. 13As a result, it has become clear throughout the whole palace guard[b] and to everyone else that I am in chains for Christ. 14Because of my chains, most of the brothers in the Lord have been encouraged to speak the word of God more courageously and fearlessly.

15It is true that some preach Christ out of envy and rivalry, but others out of goodwill. 16The latter do so in love, knowing that I am put here for the defense of the gospel. 17The former preach Christ out of selfish ambition, not sincerely, supposing that they can stir up trouble for me while I am in chains.[c] 18But what does it matter? The important thing is that in every way, whether from false motives or true, Christ is preached. And because of this I rejoice.

Yes, and I will continue to rejoice, 19for I know that through your prayers and the help given by the Spirit of Jesus Christ, what has happened to me will turn out for my deliverance.[d] 20I eagerly expect and hope that I will in no way be ashamed, but will have sufficient courage so that now as always Christ will be exalted in my body, whether by life or by death. 21For to me, to live is Christ and to die is gain. 22If I am to go on living in the body, this will mean fruitful labor for me. Yet what shall I choose? I do not know! 23I am torn between the two: I desire to depart and be with Christ, which is better by far; 24but it is more necessary for you that I remain in the body. 25Convinced of this, I know that I will remain, and I will continue with all of you for your progress and joy in the faith, 26so that through my being with you again your joy in Christ Jesus will overflow on account of me.

27Whatever happens, conduct yourselves in a manner worthy of the gospel of Christ. Then, whether I come and see you or only hear about you in my absence, I will know that you stand firm in one spirit, contending as one man for the faith of the gospel 28without being frightened in any way by those who oppose you. This is a sign to them that they will be destroyed, but that you will be saved—and that by God. 29For it has been granted to you on behalf of Christ not only to believe on him, but also to suffer for him, 30since you are going through the same struggle you saw I had, and now hear that I still have.

God, the pains I have now, I lift them up to You. All for the glory of Your wondrous name.

Tuesday, August 05, 2008


Today would have been another day. Another day I draw further from the cares of life. Another day where I draw nearer to You.

Turn your eyes upon Jesus
Look full in His wonderful face
And the things of this earth
will grow strangely dim
In the light of His glory and grace.

Monday, August 04, 2008

Wisdom and Courage

LORD, I need them both. Please give them to me!

Wait, David wait.

God, it's hard. Loneliness is such a battle. The language barrier between uni mates just gets in my way. Or is it just my, weak self-pity? I need someone to talk to. Desperately. I search and search and I realise the only one who would talk to me is You, LORD.

Work and studies is another headache. My family situation is another headache. My syndrome is a tongue-ache. But without You, all that'd be left with me is a heartache..
Help me trust You, help me to learn what I can from this circumstance, for the glory of Your name.

You give in Your timing. You withdraw in Your timing. You gave, and now you take away. May the name of the Lord Jesus Christ be praised.

Wait, David wait.