3:29AM

Aih. Another EARLY morning.

Slept at 11:49.
Woke up at 2:49.
GOD why just three hours of sleep, again?????

Obviously, I'm blogging again. And, staying at Philoxenia simultaneously. The rest in Philo went out for KFC. When I got up at 2:49, I thought I locked the door from the inside, thereby locking HocMun and Adris out by accident. Felt horrible. But since they're at KFC and didn't try to enter the room, PHEW! =)


Of all the things I miss most,

Beaches...


School...


CF...


Pork...


PERKEB....


My mom....
____________________________


---NO CAMEO---



DISAPPOINTED? SHUCKS!

____________________________

I miss Him the most. Don't you?

Remember, He misses YOU the most!

He will Hold you Together

Colossians 1:15-18

He is the image of the invisible God, the firstborn over all creation.
For by him all things were created: things in heaven and on earth, visible and invisible,
whether thrones or powers or rulers or authorities;
all things were created by him and for him.
He is before all things,
and in him all things hold together.



God keeps His word, He'll hold you together. Forever =)

4:16AM

4:16AM.

It's early. Really early. Must have been yesterday evening's coffee, lights or temperature that woke me up so early.And put me to bed so late.

Sigh. What can I do? I'll just blog till I get crappy and then go to bed (you'll be able to tell when, I think).

I was s'pposed to be up at 7am and taking a bus to Hentian Kajang to get to a friend's place for a ride to a church. Sunday Service, actually, as I have already missed evening service back home yesterday night. This was my first full week away from home in UKM. Yeah yeah, so pampered. Aha. What. Home's always where the heart is. Miss my mommy.

Listening to Blue Tree right now. Blue Tree's the Irish band from which the song 'God of this city' was originally written. Right now, it's an amazing hymn playing. [Hums along...]



..........When I survey the wondrous cross
....................On which the Prince of Glory died
......................My richest gain I count but loss
.............And pour contempt on all my pride
.............................................................................................
...........Forgetting not that I should boast
...................save in the death of Christ my LORD
..........................................All the big things that charm me most
....................................I sacrifice them to His blood
..............................................................................
..................................See from His head, His hands, his feet
................Sorrow and love, flow mingled down
...................did ever such love and sorrow meet
...............................or thorns compose so rich a crown
..........................................................................................................
................................Were the whole realm of nature mine
.........................that were an offering far too small
........................................Love so amazing, so divine
.............Demands my soul, my life, my all
.............................



4:32AM.
I'm currently talking to Jia Yi, who's over at England studying medicine.. Say's she misses mamak food. Okay, so maybe telling her I have it everyday wasn't such a good idea. Was it?
Just got a reply. She's skipping dinner for the library. Whoa.


ANYWAY.

Let's discuss UKM.
Come to think about it. I don't regret being here, not one single bit.
God's always got His hand on me, and it's as if I could literally envision Him nurturing me, allowing 'vector' circumstances(circumstances of different magnitudes and directions) to happen just so I could be here. I'm beginning to discover a new purpose in being here.

Two events that really directed me here:
1. Cellphone ringing during a JPA interview in which I did well. TWICE!
2. Forgetting to send a reply to NUS on time. NUS isn't an easy university to enter.

To do the two things above would be foolish of me, one could describe it.
I describe it as an amazingly divine work of art.

Being here, I look back at life(aiyer, so old already...) and see so many beautiful chapters being written about me by God's own hands. Who am I, that He should even bother planning my life for me. The God who exists outside of time, who can bend time, loves me. I mean, c'mon. Talk practical. Why bother, really?

Now that you can't find a solid logical reason, then it's time to stop reasoning God. He's beyond reasoning. No I don't mean He's out of control. But if you take it literally, God is out of our control. Ahaha. Oh no, crappy-talk-phase is beginning.




4:53AM. Currently listening to: To Know Your Name-Hillsongs United

Hmm...

My mind is blank. And my fingers are about to fire blanks. Time to sleep. I hope. Good-dusk. =)

Precious Presence

The Psalms in bite size
Have mercy on me, O God, have mercy on me,
for in you my soul takes refuge,
I will take refuge in the shadow of Your wings until the disaster has passed.
I cry out to the God Most High, to God, who fulfills His purpose for me.
God sends his love and faithfulness.
I will praise you, O Lord, among the nations;
I will sing of you among the peoples.
For great is your love, reaching to the skies
O my Strength, I watch for you;
you O God, are my fortress, my loving God.
For you have been my hope, O Sovereign LORD,
my confidence since youth.
But may all who seek you rejoice and be glad in you
Though you have made me see troubles, many and bitter,
you will restore my life again;
from the depths of the earth you will again bring me up.
My flesh and my heart may fail,
but God is the strength of my heart
and my portion forever.

Give thanks with a grateful heart,
Give thanks to the Holy One,
Give thanks, because He's given
Jesus Christ His Son,

And now let the weak say I am strong,
let the poor say I am rich,
because of what the Lord has done for me.
Give thanks.

Thank You, God, for Your promises, your deeds, and your faithfulness from before my birth till all eternity.

Jesus, Your name be lifted high.

God is Good.

"Naked I came from my mother's womb,
and naked I will depart.

The LORD gave and the LORD has taken away;
may the name of the LORD be praised."

In all this, Job did not sin by charging God with wrongdoing.
--THE LIFE OF JOB IN DECLINE-- Job 1.


Are we feeling confused? Overwhelmed? Is there a burden we just wish we didn't have to carry, or that we picked up at some point of your life, wishing we didn't?
Remember the words of Job; He has lost everything. First his livestock, plantations. And then his very own flesh and blood. And he lost all of them. He didn't have answers. God didn't tell him why he was put in that loss.
But we don't always need to know the answers. We just need to cling on to God's promise, that He'll see us through every situation and one day we'll look back and see what a beautiful chapter it was that God has written for our lives, provided we focus on Him of course. God doesn't promise rosy circumstances most of the time. But He did promise we'll walk through it.




God promised me what is good. And He doesn't go back on His promises. Maybe I am not in a 'good' situation right now. Well that's me defining what's good, not God Himself. What I am going through is INDEED good. In His eyes.

"For His ways are higher than our ways, and His thoughts than our thoughts" Isaiah 55:9

However 'good' the situation we are in, we're going to get through it anyway. But it's the process of going through it is more important. What are we doing in this process? Praising God, or blaming Him?

Job didn't charge God for wrongdoing. Imagine that. He lost everything, and didn't blame God. In fact he praised Him. Would we?

How great is our God, exactly?

Do you not know?
Have you not heard?
the LORD is the everlasting God.
the Creator of the ends of the earth.
He will not grow tired or weary,
and his understanding no one can fathom.

He gives strength to the weary and increases the power of the weak.
Even youths grow tired and weary, and young men stumble and fall;

But those who hope in the LORD
will renew their strength.
They will soar on wings like eagles;
they will run and not grow weary,
they will walk and not be faint.

Isaiah 40:28 -31

Joy! The Real Deal!

Can you hear it? Do you sense it?

Can you hear it? That's heaven singing:

"Glory to the LORD Almighty!"

Rejoice! He formed us, He redeemed us, He calls us! He has set us FREE!
Our circumstances are for His glory.
Our pains are for His glory.
Our successes are for His glory.
Our freedom is for His glory.
Our past is for His glory.
Our present is for His glory.
Our future is for His glory.
We are for His glory.
Creation is for His glory.



Prepare the way for the LORD. Lift up the gates!
Open the doors, let the music play!
Let the streets resound with singing!
Let's go, wait no longer, join His renown today and give Him all glory!



Just can't wait to get to heaven!

Pressing on towards the goal

Philippians 3:12-14

Not that I have already obtained all this, or have already been made perfect, but I press on to take hold of that for which Christ Jesus took hold of me. Brothers, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus.

Philippians 3:12-14

Paul here explains that he does ONE THING, but he shows up three fingers and says:
1. forgetting what is behind
2. straining toward what is ahead
3. pressing on toward the goal to win the prize

Paul was not playing dumb. He meant to focus on the 1st part.
It's easy enough for me to live out the 2nd and 3rd part.... But what's hardest sometimes is to forget the past.

Forgetting my past achievements
Forgetting my past mistakes
Forgetting my past pains

It must've been hard for Paul to preach about the One he just presecuted. Throughout his preaching days, he must've been continually reminded by Satan about how he used to persecute the one he now preaches about. Imagine how hard it would've been for him.

And now, I.

Forgetting here does not mean I lose the memory of what happened, it means that past memories loses all power to grip me and hold me back from achieving what the Father has in store for me.

Satan always uses your past against you. What do you do? You remind him of his future. And you tell him that God is your father, that you are the child of the owner of the universe. Are you afraid to face issues in life because you're reminded of your past? Know this:

We did not recieve the spirit that makes us a slave again to fear, but we have recieved the spirit of sonship and by Him we cry "Abba, Father".


Stare your fear in the eye, say: "My father has given me authority over you. Get out of my way."



My prayer: Thank You for Your grace, Father.
Help me to forget the past. Help me to forgive myself, because You've already forgiven me by Jesus' blood. I receive again the courage that comes as a result of being Your child. If You are for me, then who can be against me? I love you Jesus.

His Glory or Mine?

His, of course =)

Taman S.E.A - part 2 -

Other reasons why I miss Taman S.E.A.

Relationships! Classmates and friends who make your day!
- Friends who get you into trouble but never fails to get you out of it.


SK, Jeen, Shannon, Yvonne..

SK, do your best in Cuba! Stay round, not a cube.. haha..

Sam, when are you and ::ahem:: guy? let more people know?
I had to find out from others...


- Teachers who we sometimes frustrate, and who sometimes bore us, and yet we know their heart, and they're human like us..



I wish I had more suitable pictures to add, pictures have a higher 'stories-told-per-bytes' ratio...........

Anyway! 6 Atas Kenanga!!! I will not add pictures for these... cause I haven't any =)

Taman S.E.A. - part 1 -

I miss SMK Taman S.E.A. for several reasons:

1. My CF! Been there for 7 whole years! Seen it all, done it all! This post is just for the CF!

7 CF Camps, 7 postal quizzes, 7 BK quizzes, and hundreds of mamak sessions!


First one goes to my CF teacher. Pn Julie!
She's been a real guide, and a blessing. For you Taman SEAers who dread her discipline, remember that discipline builds character! Invaluable to your future! So start appreciating it! Heh.
Hid the face to show how humble we CFers are. Or rather, because I couldn't find any better pictures.
And the other Cf teachers too, Pn. Joy, Pn. Phua, Pn Carol, Miss Anne, Pn. Caroline.



My '06/07 CF commitee. We were at the CF camp back then. The people who I've taken for granted sometimes. God bless all of you! Sorry if I left anyone out.

Left to right->
Aku,(VP)
Mike J,(Music)
Kel Vin,(Music)
Josiah,(Music)
Yew San,(Secretarial)
Jeremy,(Treasury)
Raymas,(Portfolioless haha)
John,(PA)
Clarice,(Music)
Me,
Er where did that guy come from? Thomas?
Jared,(PA)
Wei Jun,(PA)
Samuel,(Khas)
Cheng Hong,(Khas)
Charmaine,(Music)
Oh no what was her name?(Music)
Chow Ern,(Khas)
Mei Wan,(Khas)
Su Laine,(Khas)
Brandon,(Khas)
Hui Ying,(Khas)
Timothy,(PA)
Wai Yan,(VP)
Gloria,(Secretarial)
Christine,(VP)
Chow Ping,(Recess Meetings)
Chloe,(Khas)
Yuen Yim,(Recess Meetings)
Huey Lin.(Khas)

Others who were absent:
Joanne(Recess Meetings)
Tian Xiong(Khas)




This one's special. Tian Xiong!(rightmost). God somehow used me to mentor Him. Used to be very quiet. By His grace, today TX is a faithful servant in the CF! Woohoo!


That was me(white top with black pattern) during our CF Camp in '06. A random pic.


This one goes to you Sook Kuan!(rightmost) Sorry lar, hard to find a picture.
-Friends are rare. Friends like SK are rareR.


My mentors and friends. (From left), Lordson, Hoc Mun, Christopher, Jeen, Rachel, Josh, Naresh, Simon, and Thad!


Our CF meeting in '04. We had two rooms back then. Now it's one. Still, it's not about the numbers. It's about lives.

The superb dance team back then! A real testimony by the CF to the school














We have candlelight sessions(unplugged worship in the Peacehaven carpark) everytime we have CF camp! This one was 6 years ago.














CF Camp '03 Group Photo.

CF Presidents
2001 - Yew Kong
2002 - Yew Meng
2003 - Janice
2004 - Lester
2005 - Rachel
2006 - Tze Nie
2007 - Me
2008 - Alysha
2009 - Wai Yan
2010 - Jared?
2011 - Tian Xiong?
2012 - Yew Leung?

You know, I realised I don't appear in many of the group pictures either. What can I say, leadership is a lonely responsibility.

HAHA. Let's see if the unforeseen comes to pass. God bless Taman SEA CF. CF belongs to You alone. So do every life that is influenced as a result of You using the CF.

You reign, King Jesus.

Emotions long gone. Moving On.

Moving on, once and for all means, once u tell God "I dun wanna feel this way again, I wanna put this rock down because it's too heavy for me to carry, I wanna hand my life, thoughts, and everything back to You. God I know it will b hard, You know it's hard. So, I ask of You to carry me through this, to be my strength and comforter...."

by a close friend

... because I cannot carry it with my own frail strength. I pray that in Your grace and mercy, I will not look back or pick up what I left behind. Change my heart LORD from seeking the past to seeking your face.

by Me

How do I handle my burdens?

Three times I pleaded with the Lord to take it away from me. But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ's sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong.

2 Cor 12:8-9

Do you not know?
Have you not heard?
The LORD is the everlasting God,
the Creator of the ends of the earth.
He will not grow tired or weary,
and his understanding no one can fathom.

He gives strength to the weary
and increases the power of the weak.

Even youths grow tired and weary,
and young men stumble and fall;

but those who hope in the LORD
will renew their strength.
They will soar on wings like eagles;
they will run and not grow weary,
they will walk and not be faint.

Isaiah 40:28-31

"But they that wait upon the LORD
shall renew their strength;
they shall mount up with wings as EAGLES
they shall run, and not be weary;
and they shall walk, and not faint"

An eagle knows when a storm is approaching long before it breaks. The eagle will fly to some high spot and wait for the winds to come. When the storm hits, it sets its wings so that the wind will pick it up and lift it above the storm. While the storm rages below, the eagle is soaring above it. The eagle does not escape the storm, it simply uses the storm to lift it higher. It rises on the winds that bring the storm.
The storms do not have to overcome us, we can allow God's power to lift us above them. God enables us to ride the winds of the storm that bring sickness, tragedy, failure, and disappointment into our lives. We can soar above the storm.
It is not the burdens of life that weigh us down, it is how we handle them.